getting churchy....

Warning: Personal thoughts about to be spoken, if you do not agree that is ok but this is based on my perception of what our culture has turned Bible Study into. (Specifically speaking about women's ministry but applies to all.)

I believe Bible Study has become a misleading assurance that you are doing what God has called you to do. 

Before you slam your computer shut or press the home button on your smart phone hear me out. 

Bible Study has become the Mecca for women on Wednesday mornings. {And on select evenings and sometimes it is offered on other mornings as well depending on how big the church etc.} But, for most, Wednesday mornings is the place to be.

Bible Studies offer a time for women to get together and study God's word, to "fellowship", and to worship together. For the moms of young kids this can be her only time for adult conversation and becomes her sanity for the week.

You chose from a wonderful array of studies that have been authored by incredible women, pick a time slot that works for your schedule and show up.

Most offer a video guided study, have weekly homework to do in your Bible study workbook, and if you are totally "on it" you complete all five days of carefully laid out, well organized study along with the questions. If you are really up for the challenge you answer the "personal responses". You know those questions that don't have a clear cut and dry answer but instead ask you, "how do you feel about this passage of scripture?" Or "do you have a time in your life that was affected by this type of situation?" (And btw, don't be afraid to share this during group time.) 

Sometimes the author has even added additional historical information in the study as a little extra bonus. These are typically super interesting and loaded with facts and "original text" meanings that will leave you floored with how cool God is. This helps fit the pieces of history and scripture together AND it is all right there in a two page section of your Bible study workbook titled "bonus section" or "extra reading". 

Wednesday morning arrives and you "get ready" for Bible study. Makeup, hair, semi-church clothes, jewelry, oh maybe a catchy looking scarf.... and boots!  You grab your Bible, your workbook, a cool looking pen , a highlighter so you can look very prepared, and a cute tote-bag to carry everything in. *Don't forget your travel mug from last years women's retreat* 

On the drive there you are jamming out to some Chris Tomlin or maybe Matt Redman... a little "10,000 reasons" always puts you in the mood to study God's word. You pull up to the church and park. 

You walk through the double doors where you are hit with the aroma of coffee! The senses go into overload as you see the beautiful display of coffee set up, sweet treats and salty morning goodies, hot teas, and super cute napkins to match the time of year we are in. You go to the "name tag" table and find your name printed on these perfectly printed name tags that not only match the time of year and season but also color coordinate with the churches women's ministry logo! You hear a few other women walking up behind you. They are just flabbergasted with delight as they say, "oh I would have never thought of all these details! Aren't our name tags just darling?! I saw this font on Pinterest and it was a free download! I just love the gray and yellow chevron pattern table cloths on the tables, don't you?" 

Music is playing as you walk into the sanctuary and you find a seat. Chat a bit with a few of the ladies around you and then the music softens. The women's ministry leader welcomes everyone, prays, and starts the video to watch. The next 45 minutes of video lecture you take notes in your workbook study guide, awe over a few of the new facts you've learned, give a "mmhumm" at those points you agree with and the "amens" are just randomly shouted out by those women that really REALLY agree! I love it when I hear a "yes sister", because you know that meant what the woman just said on that video was on POINT! 

Video session ends and you split to small group time. Talk about your homework. Listen to the prayer request, talk about whoever brought that yumminess with the egg and sausage, and then say a closing prayer. At this time you are dismissed... 

There you have it, a complete run down of Wednesday morning Bible Study.

Do you guys see it? Is it just me? How has this become the pinnacle/apogee of our Christian life for "us women"? How has "going to Bible study" become the "acting out" of our Christian life?

The buck stops here, so to speak, when you look at so many of the believers of our culture today. 

It is scary, the facade of living this way has made us deaf and has blinded us to what God really calls us to do as believers. We become utterly paralyzed.

Please don't get me wrong or confused by what I am trying to say.

Bible Study is good.

We should study the Bible.

Women's ministry is great.

Bible Studies for women, great.

But... This is a big BUT (and if the butt song just came to your mind you just aged yourself) ;)

If going to Bible study is your definition of living out your "Christian life" than you have been fooled. This is right where "The Great Deceiver" wants you to be, both blind and deaf to what the Lord calls you to do. 

Think about that for a moment.  The Great "Deciever" doesn't want you to go join the Satanic Church....that would be stupid. No, The Great Deceiver, wants you to be as close to God as you can be, without actually doing what God wants you to do.  We tell our kids, "delayed obedience is disobedience."  

God wants all.  The Great Deceiver wants anything less.  

"These two young men are in great danger. They have a mental apprehension of God’s Truth which unless lived out will be their peril."

-Margaret Barber speaking of Faithful Luke and Watchman Nee

We study, and pray, and follow SO THAT we are well armed for the acting out of this Gospel in our lives.  

But, as Christ is the zenith of our faith, we comfortably move to worship Christianity instead of Christ.  As we eliminate the "SO THAT" in our reason to study, we and everything we do, now becomes the focus of our worship.  Our study of God's word as a catalyst, now becomes the landing zone, the final resting place of our faith, not the launching pad always intended.  

"These Christians remind me of "the fattest people on earth" who have consumed so much food that they can no longer walk. They are fed more and more knowledge every week. They attend church services, join small group Bible Studies, read Christian books, listen to podcasts and are convinced they still need more knowledge. Continually listening to the Word without applying it has made Christians' ears dull to God's call.That's a very dangerous place to be and yet, man, that's happening. Every church across this nation, we've fallen into that pattern." - Frances Chan

number 8?? the journey continues...

When Jon and I started down the adoption road we knew that this was going to be a long road. Meaning that this was the designed path that God has us on right now and we are meant to stay on this road until the road closes.

We did not know when we were suppose to adopt again but knew we needed to keep our hearts open as the Lord leads. 

To be honest and real, "me, myself, and I", do not "want" anymore kids. It's not that I don't love kids, I do, but I don't have this gushy draw towards babies or yearning to "parent" every child I see. I am by no means a "natural" when it comes to being the "Suzy homemaker". I tried on that hat. For about four years maybe five, I did my best to cook like a boss and have the house cleaned looking like a magazine cover for "Better Homes and Gardens." I would make cakes and have themed birthdays and for the record this was all before Pinterest so I felt pretty darn creative as I would purchase all the cute stuff from "Birthday Express" and make a killer Wilton birthday cake! Pre Pinterest life was awesome! Pinterest started all these great ideas and also created all these wonderful coined phrases known as "Mom Fails" and "Nailed It". I love these, really... I truly laugh at these post with the tears streaming my face just like the little emoji! 😂

 

And I know this is a touchy topic for some, but I am putting it out there: I homeschooled my kids. I was following the advise of those around me and it about did me in. I would cry and cry over the stupid school work. I hated with a passion homeschooling! Of course there were days where I felt like queen of the universe as Aaron and Becca read a book or did their math correct but FOR THE LOVE....Short and simple- I am NOT a homeschool mom! (Great job all of you awesome homeschool parents! You simply rock and deserve amble date nights and coffee! Please don't try to convince me to join you again. I respect you, but I am not one of you.) 

I am just not that mom, I tried. The amount of stress it caused me and my family was ridiculous! I will claim the "Mom Fail" here and be proud of all those times I "nailed it". As for the present time and place I have "let it go". 

It does sound awful to say, I don't want anymore kids... But it's not always about me, and my wants and my desires. I tried doing things my way and it left me stressed, tired, and down right exhausted! As I aimed to please those around me, I lost focus on the God who loved me and created me for something different and nothing was going to bring me peace (peace as in scriptural, God spoken, spirit filled peace) until I did what God intended of me. My life, my purpose by His design. 

So this is where I find myself today:

At this moment I am sitting in bed, snuggled next to my "love muffin". I have had two cups of coffee, five kids have been sent off to school by bus and one driven to school this morning. Six out the door, out of the house, they were given nutritional substance of waffles, eggs, oatmeal, and a few grabbed a pack of fruit snacks as they headed out the door. The house is "straighten" to the point of, "I guess I won't be too embarrassed if someone stops by". Laundry has been going... well, let's just say laundry does not stop going, and I am enjoying the peace and quiet of this precious moment of life. As Jon will be leaving to work soon and not going to be back till the wee hours, I am just going to savor this time listening to him sleep. He, our provider, our rock, is resting and I could not be more thankful for him.

So, what's up with adoption if I am not wanting any more kids?? 

The road we are on as a family, is the road of surrendered-ness. We will follow as the Lord leads and right now He is leading us to the road of adoption, again. It's NOT about wanting more children, it is not about growing our family, for us it is about obeying what we have been called to do.

How do you know you have been called to adopt? Well, I cannot answer that for anyone else. But for us, we can explain it by saying this is our purpose. 

Our social worker once told us, "some families are just not able to handle all the noise and craziness that comes from having so many kids with so many different backgrounds and some are. You guys are. You don't sweat the small stuff. You just go with the flow." This is by no means giving us a kudos and pat on the back. This is saying, for us this is what we have been called to do. 

I am not the best mom in the world who can do every amazing DIY project, or the homeschool mom of 19 kids who can keep her "act" together.  I am not the gushy baby loving mom who losing it at the church nursery just because I need some sort of baby fix.

But, for this first time in my life I know what God created me for and that is to be a mom.

A mom who messes up everyday. A mom who gives tough love and sweet love. A mom who may not want more kids but knows that my "want" is not His desire for my life. His want and His plan and His desire is for me to not do it on my own strength and power but by His.

So when my eye are fixed on Him my "want" changes. And my heart melts as I see the broken and lost. I see the unwanted and neglected. The abandoned and abused... and I say "Yes". Yes, Lord I know we are only but one family but we say yes, because if it is only to a few or to many we will say yes. Yes, I will be a mom to more. Yes, we as our family, will be a family to more SO THAT they will become more than orphans and be orphans no more.

We are on the road of adoption and now that road has lead us to our son!! 

Our road to Kade has been incredible!!! We cannot wait to share this journey we are on! 

Currently we have been PreApproved by China, so in adoption lingo we can shout out, "we have our PA!" 

Please pray with us as we still have loads to do! 

So stinking excited about our little Allen who waits for us 12,000 miles away! He has no clue yet that we, his family, are doing all that we can to bring him home!! In love and smitten!! It's a BOY...again!! 😉

"Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives."- Galatians 5:25 

please help!

Oh our sweet Andy is yet again in he need for a family. There are no words to describe the heart break of a family who is in full swing of adopting a child and then has to stop for whatever reason. This is the case with the family that was adopting Andy.

Andy. needs. a. family.

Are you his family?

Do you know who might be his family?

Need help knowing where to start? I can help and point you in the right directions.
Don't think you have the money... Trust me when I say, many here in the Social Media world want to see Andy adopted, many are willing to help support the family who is adopting him. As well as many adoption grants to apply for!
Andy ages out June 1st! It IS possible to get all the paperwork done from start to finish!

Need help?? Send me a message on the "Get Connected" tab of our website: www.oursurrenderedlives.com

Want to talk with someone who has met Andy, not only once but twice? Well, we can hook you up with that too! ;)

Want to know more about Andy's file??
Contact: April Uduhiri at april.uduhiri@gladney.org

There is even a Video of Andy!! http://vimeo.com/103536786
Click here to read another post about Andy.

PELASE SHARE THIS POST AND GET THE WORD OUT, LET'S WORK TOGETHER TO BRING HIM HOME!

amazing update!!

Psalm 27:7 - "Hear me as I pray, O Lord. Be merciful and answer me."

Have you ever prayed for something or someone and you don't know exactly how the outcome of a prayer is going to be? You have faith that the Lord will indeed answer, but just don't really see the possibility for the request you are making before the Lord because your request seems so HUGE!? {yes that sentence was most likely a grammatical mess} 

Well, last night was one of those pretty flat out, face to the ground kinda nights. All of a sudden as I am scrolling through the news-feeds of life on Facebook, up pops a post. As soon as I started to read it my heart was just pounding. I was like could this be, is this really what I think it could be?? I clicked on the link attached to the post and there staring back at me is the sweetest face! 

ANDY, it was ANDY!!  And his picture was attached to a "go-fund-me" link!!! 

Do you have any idea what this means?? 

It means he has a FAMILY!!! Can you all just do a little happy dance with me!?! 

I was just in tears of joy over this last night and my heart about pounded out of my chest!!!

For the Love of all that is good in this world, Andy has a family and he will be coming home!! 

Oh, and what's so crazy cool is that he will be in Georgia!!! It will be the greatest joy to be able to meet this precious boy who has waited for so long to be wanted, to be found, and to be home!!

Here is the answer to my prayers and the prayers of so many: The McBride Family

This, this is what it's all about!!

 

step by step...

December of 2001, was a particularly hard time in my life. I am not going to bore you with all the details but to set the "tone" I'll try to paint the picture:

 

I was a mom to the most beautiful child in the world.

I had just moved back in with my parents as Aaron and I were literally kicked out of our apartment. I had received a call from my husband at the time who told me I had till 6pm to get our stuff out because he was changing the locks on the door. An incredible group of people from the church I was attending along with a sheriff from the church all came and helped pack up the belongings, Aaron's clothes, furniture, all the pictures of Aaron I could grab and Christmas ornaments off the little Christmas tree in our apartment. I don't know why that always stuck with me as being one of the hardest things I did.

 

Removing Christmas ornaments from "our tree". My mom had given me childhood ornaments in 1999 to put on "our" first Christmas tree together and now in 2001, I was removing them along with Aaron's "1st Christmas" baby ornaments, and these precious purple ornaments my sister had bought because I love the color purple. It was just all so surreal, for whatever reason, that is one of the most vivid memories I have of that moment in time.

 

 

Thankful for my parents and a place to go, Aaron and I moved in December of 2001. I remember being in a guest room of my parents house with Aaron in a room right next to mine. Many nights I just cried. I would rock in a rocking chair holding my baby boy and cry silent tears. I would pray for God to be the father to my son. I never thought that I would be married again... I knew I did not want to be alone but in those early moments of being just Aaron and I, the thought never entered my mind. 

 

In those evening hours I would cry... But there in that guest room of my parents house was a book. A book that inevitably gave me comfort and hope. The book was titled, "Just enough Light for the Step I'm On" by Stormie Omartian

 

I remember reading the intro to this book and having some sort of "aha" moment. Like, "Okay God, this pretty much sucks right now and I know I have not truly trusted you with all aspects of my life and I totally know a lot of what I am going through is consequences of my own actions BUT, I GIVE UP!"

If the song "Jesus take the wheel" was around in 2001 you better believe that would have been my anthem! For at that moment "I was letting Go!"

 

I did not want to fear these next steps of life, I did not know where or how or what was going to happen next. But God did... So as cheese ball as it sounds (I was young okay) I prayed; I prayed the title of the book, "Dear God, please just give me enough light for the step I'm on. I trust you got this. I need you to be the father for my son and give me strength because I am not strong on my own- amen"

INTRO to the Book:

"More and more, God is teaching me to trust Him for every step I take. He constantly calls me to stretch beyond what's comfortable. To walk through new territory when I would rather stay with the familiar. To face difficult physical, mental, and emotional challenges. To do things I know I can't achieve by myself without His power. Each time something is required of me that I'm certain I am unable to accomplish in my own strength, I see a picture of just one or two steps being illuminated, while those before and after are engulfed in darkness and cannot be seen. This describes my walk with God. I trust Him for each day of life, grateful for every breath, determined to look for the blessing in the moment, no matter what the circumstances. I follow His lead - even when I can't see where I'm going, even when it scares me to do so - because deep within my spirit I know that these simple steps of faith are preparing me for eternity."-- Stormie Omartian

 

As I read these words I first read 14 years ago I am in awe at how having trusted God to lead me for those first steps I was on, he continues to do so. I have stumbled many times... More times than I can remember and a lot of times they were not stumbles but major face plants and scraped knees that left scars. But the beautiful thing; scars are left because of healing. There may always be a reminder of the pain...but if there was never pain, there would be no need for the healing. Yes, to be straight up honest I could totally do without any of the pain or hurt or suffering, for real! But what I have come to learn, and by learn I mean still in the process of understanding, is that although the pain is sometimes self inflicted because of my own mistakes or because sometimes it is just due to the consequences of living in a broken and fallen world, there is a hope that I now place my faith in. 

 "The Lord directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the Lord holds them by the hand."- Psalm 37:23-24

offensive much???

F#ck!

 

Orphans are everywhere. They are alone, unloved, and separated from their forever families.  Many will die in their orphanages today, many more will die this year.  It doesn't matter though, does it? "They are just orphans."

 

Seriously, why are you still hung up on the word "f#ck"?  

Does it make you feel a little uneasy?  Maybe a little upset, or even appalled?

So how come I can say "orphan" and it doesn't have the same affect.  

One is just a crass word, but the other, it means separation. 

It means sadness.  

It means loneliness.  

It means forgotten.

 

Jesus called people who got more offended at words than at inaction, whitewashed tombs. Do you feel the weight of that point?  David Platt notes on the subject HERE

 

Matthew 23:27 New Living Translation (NLT)

“What sorrow awaits you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs—beautiful on the outside but filled on the inside with dead people’s bones and all sorts of impurity.

 

God has called ALL to orphan care.  All.  Period.  All.  Done.

Prove me wrong!

That does not mean that all are supposed to adopt. That does mean that everyone plays a part in caring for the least of these. 

 

There is simply not enough time to continue beating around the bush.  

Here's a multiple choice question:

What part in an orphans life are you playing? 

a. Adopting

b. Supporting an adopted family

c. Advocating for orphans

d. Creating awareness of the epidemic.

e. None of the above

 

So how'd you do?

The good news is you had an 80% chance of answering correctly.  

 

I grew up fearing hell.  Anyone else grow up fearing hell?  

I grew up hearing hell, fire, and brimstone messages about the pain and the agony of hell. 

The catalyst to salvation was a solid fear of hell.  Quite literally, I had the hell scared out of me, or more accurately, the me scared out of hell.  

I heard so much about it, that I wanted to do whatever I could to get out of it.  

Hell is a terrible place, but it is not the reason to surrender a life to Christ.  

The real reason, is separation from God. While hell is so vial, what's more is the eternal damnation of separation from our father for all of eternity.  

Hell is punishment. 

Prison is punishment.

 

But, I heard a "prisoner for life" the other day talk about how he will never be able to throw ball with his son again.  

The prison is punishment, but the separation is the greater loss.

Do you see the parallel?

 

Orphan is separation.  We were, and many still are, separated from our father, our creator, our eternal purpose.

Hell is a terrible place, but God did not save us "FROM" hell.  

He saves us "TO" himself.  

 

I have the honor of working out with two of the greatest men I know.  They are firefighters.  

Day in and day out, they go into situations to save souls from fire.  

You know, I've seen a couple of car fires in my lifetime, and I've come to notice something. I have never seen a fire truck full of suited up firemen, pull up to a fire, and then yell from the truck to the victim, "Get out of the burning vehicle and come join us in the safety of our truck!"

 

No, these men, and I mean men, get out of the truck, with full gear, often running against the flow of scared onlookers, they rely on their training, and then go into the battle zone to rescue a dying soul.  A person once in certain separation from life, now sees the mask of a firefighter coming to their rescue, and with an outstretched fireman's hand, the lost soul takes hold of a life saving relationship with that brave rescuer, that beautiful redeemer.  

 

That is what it is to rescue an orphan.  

We came into this world as spiritual bastards. The byproduct of a broken relationship.  The ridicule of all that is good. 

 

But God...there it is!!!  That heart wrenching, climatic moment.....

 

But God....loved us so much that he chose to take us into his family.  We were orphans.  We were homeless, aimless.  Purposeless.  

And he looks at us, and tells us that even if it costs him his very son, he is going to take us in.  We can become his very own, forever.  

That's crazy!  That's insane! That doesn't make sense!

As the book that I'm reading right now is so aptly titled, this is "The Insanity of God."

It is careless, it is messy, it is dirty work.

But it is his chosen path from orphaned to adopted.

Why then are we any different?

 

JJ, my seven year old, was walking around the other day in daddy's shoes.  He likes to do this.  He likes to see how in the world dad walks around in these size 12's.

I think he even wonders sometimes if it makes him look more like dad.

 

Walk in your father's shoes.  Look like him, because if you are surrendered, then He lives in you and through you. He will complete every good work through you.  

 

And, you find that you will look more and more like him, doing the thing that he does so well each and every day. 

Adopting orphans into his forever family. 

 

How could we be any different?  I'm scared we already know that answer.

 

"But when the right time came, God sent his Son, born of a woman, subject to the law. God sent him to buy freedom for us who were slaves to the law, so that he could adopt us as his very own children. And because we are his children, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, prompting us to call out, “Abba, Father.” Now you are no longer a slave but God’s own child. And since you are his child, God has made you his heir. "

Galatians 4:4-7

useful uselessness...

I work on cars.  

I always have. It's something I picked up watching my dad.

Sometimes I just don't have the right tool.  

Looking under the hood, I see something that can only be fixed if I relentlessly bang on it.  

With an "ah hah" moment, I go to the toolbox knowing I have just the tool for that job.  And yes, I reach right past the......hammer, to my wrench.  

Can you imagine what my hammer is thinking??  

Rejected?  

Inferior?  

Useless?  

And oh! My poor wrench.  If it had any idea that I was going to literally beat it within an inch of its life, it would have crawled into another drawer. 

But!!  Oh I love this part!  But in full surrender, full submission, my wrench gives itself up to be useful.  

Bang! 

Bam!  

Crash!  

goes the sounds from under the car hood.  

The hammer sits and smirks as it knows better, and the wrench is just slapped silly.  

And then it happens.  

What was broken is now repaired.  What was once a lost cause, now has renewal of life.  And my car engine starts.

As I return my wrench to the drawer, covered in engine oil, now bearing scars forever visible, even a bit disfigured, my hammer looks over and scoffs.  

I know this is what they are thinking!! ;)

But what my tools didn't know is that while I have a hammer to bang on stuff, this particular situation required getting around the alternator, which the hammer could never do.  It simply wasn't built for that kind of application. 

But my wrench, oh that ever available wrench, it fit perfectly behind the alternator and just like that, became the right tool for the job. 

The hammer will never know this truth.  

The wrench only knows by experience.  

I don't consult with my tools either.  

I love my tools.  But i wield them at will...even against their supposed purpose...to make much of my will. 

And so it is with our Father.

“I am no longer anxious about anything, as I realize that He is able to carry out His will for me. It does not matter where He places me, or how. That is for Him to consider, not me, for in the easiest positions He will give me grace, and in the most difficult ones His grace is sufficient.”

J. Hudson Taylor - missionary to China